Sunday, September 19, 2010

Something's Gotta Give

Can I just say that frustration sometimes rules me life? Okay, so there it is. And it does.
I'm currently far from home and have been for quite some time and it's been pretty great; well, it's been pretty great for the most part. There are people both at home and in my present situation who simply tick me off.
For example: There are certain people in my general vicinity whom have every opportunity in the universe to choose to do the right thing and they choose the wrong thing simply because it seems much less complicated. I have seen all sorts of scantily clad young adults strewn about the campus. I'm almost certain that they know better, and that is what bothers me the most. Another taunting occurrence in my location is the prospect of young men who should be focusing on a completely different task than the task with which they have decided to concern their time with. You see, in my church young men are strongly encouraged to serve a church mission at the age of nineteen. I go to a junior college where the young men are either nineteen, home from their church mission, or simply eighty-sixing the whole "mission thing." I hesitate to become too incredibly interested in anybody at my school simply because they don't interest me. At the same time, I don't want to be the only girl in my apartment not going to a dance. That's what happened to me in high school and I guess I fooled myself into believing that college was going to be any different. It's all so superfluous that I don't know why I'm even writing about it.
Now back home there are people who simply send me reeling and not in a good way. I do not understand how certain people can still enrage me when we're so far apart. I likely have facebook and texting to blame for those things. I cannot stand fake people who get everything they wish for and things they do not deserve. I do the best I can with the prospects I have and still seem to come up short socially. I've never been to a school dance of any sort. I've never been asked on a date because somebody actually liked me as more than a friend. I'm often alone when I don't want to be.
It's just frustrating. Many things are frustrating. I think the most frustrating thing about humanity is it's love for blatant stupidity. I wish that people in general would just get a clue and come to realize that the world sure as heck doesn't revolve around their sorry rear-ends and it will not at any point in the near future. It can be difficult to look around and not like what you see; what I see is that I'm apparently the only one trying my hardest every day to be the best human being I can be. Yes I falter and make mistakes, but I don't let them define the rest of my life. They simply aide in my progression toward perfection. I just want people to make good decision and to not be fake. It would appear that I am asking too much.

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